While Toni Bernhard’s book is speaking specifically about chronic illness experiences, this idea shared here seems to resonate around grief experiences, whatever the cause. It begs the question, how do we allow for both the experiences of the glory of solitude AND for the loneliness — and all the experiences in between those two — to just BE without shame complicating the experience? When grief experience has brought us to lonely tears, how do we take notice and figure out what we need? Self-care is community care in that those lonely moments for self might be tended best by reaching out to your loves. How are we able to set ourselves up to best tend in the difficult moments? What is it in the glory of solitude that works for us? How can we remember those things about solitude that work when the loneliness hits? Even if we have experiences where we are “not always successful” in our attempts, what can we notice about those times? What surprises us in those times? What can we learn and carry forward for the next time things are difficult?